Tuesday, June 24, 2008

The Bog I should have written weeks ago

"Honey, this family is one of survivors. At the core, we are a blue collar family, with strong morals, and ethics, but its our love for one another that we use to help each other. We are a family of immigrants, born of strength, and honor, and love. You'll be surprised at how strong your family truly is" - From "Her Kitchen Table - my Sunday afternoons with Laura Petruzzelli" , February 2004

I know that the reason I started this blog was to write about racing, training and multi-sport in general. And to that end, I have done so, and to keep that up, I will comment that I races this past weekend, and won the Overall open title for the Olympic Distance Du at Maumee Bay in Ohio, - the Battle of Ohio. It was a great feeling and a great win, one I definitely needed, and hope to build on for the rest of the season. And I need to thank my ever-patient coach, Jenny Garrison, for her faith, and her drive, to make sure I didn't get down on myself from prior races, and held it together, even in the roughest times on Sunday

But, what I really wanted to write about, and haven't for a few weeks, was something I witnessed over the weekend of May 31-June 1. It was the 2 day, Avon Breast Cancer Walk, and my sister, girlfriend and cousin, a breast cancer survivor, participated. For those who don't know what its about, its a 2 day walk, where the participants walk 26.2 miles the first day, and 13.1 on the second, finishing at Soldiers Field. This was my sister's second time at this, she had done it last year as well, and I was there with her, her husband and my niece to watch her finish. This year, it hit even closer to home when my girlfriend decided she too wanted to do it, and when my family discovered that another of my cousins had just been diagnosed with breast cancer.

So, over that weekend, I watched a sea of pink, band together, close to 5000 people strong, walking for to stomp out this disease. And there were all walks of life, from mothers, daughters, sisters, wives, grandmothers, all, walking together, laughing, and crying to complete this journey, and show thier support, to prove that they will not go gentle into that good night. As an athlete, it was inspiring, beautiful actually, knowing these women, weren't out there to compete with one another, but to help each other. Strangers, stopped to give some water or Gatorade to a walker in need. These women, with a complete out-pouring of love and determination, the likes of which you rarely see anymore. Over those 2 days, those women dwarfed what I do as an athlete, b/c they did it for someone else, the entire process was selfless. There was no medal or trophy at the finish, just food, and family, and respect, and a well deserved thank you, for doing something for others.

As an athlete, that can be a very foriegn concept. When we race, we are usually doing it for ourselves. Even if the proceeds of entry fees go to charity, we are still out there to win, for ourselves, not others. We can easily pay lip service to saying how important it is that we do races for a cause, but, at the end of the day, we hope it is our name that is called to come to the podium to get our award. I fully admit, I do that, and I venture to guess others do as well. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with it. Which is why what these women did, is that much more amazing to me. You can't get a multi-sport athlete to walk around the block for coffee, let alone 39 miles. It just doesn't happen. I know this, b/c everyone I talked to about it, said the same thing - "No way I'm walking that far. I'll run 20 miles, but walk? Are you nuts?" Or some variation thereof.

So how does that quote from my grandmother fit in? Well, watching my sister do that walk, I realized, she is living proof of my grandmother's words. I think a lot of us in this family embody those sentiments, but, on that weekend, she shone brightest, and it was made even clearer by the words she wrote on her bib number - "I am walking for those who can't". My sister, who carries my grandmother's name, without realizing it, carries her heart and soul as well. My sister is not an athlete, but, she would be damned if she didn't finish that walk, and do it in a pretty good clip to boot.

Unfortunately, in my family, cancer is all around us. Uncles, aunts, fathers, mothers, daughters, brothers, lots of people in my family suffer different variations of it. I lost my Nonno to it, and I lost a piece of myself as well when she died. But, I know, as a family, we will fight, and fight, and fight, till the bitter end, to survive, and more importantly, become stronger as we battle through. And I know too, that my roots, lie within my grandmother's words as well, and it is that, my fellow readers, that I used this past weekend, to remind myself why, I cannot ever quit, why I cannot and will never give up; its not in my genes. No matter how white the pain, it is nothing compared to what she, and others in my family survived.

So this is for both Lauras in my life - at 33 and 96 I have learned more from both of you than any class, book, lecture, etc. And most importantly, I learned what I am made of.