Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Can't keep a good man down

The only way I know how to start this blog, is by diving right into the subject - my rehab and progress.

Yesterday, I saw my surgeon, Dr. Chudick, marking the 10 week date since surgery. He and I both knew what was on my mind, especially after he saw me walk in, very determined, very anxious to get answers. Immediately, I was taken into the X-Ray room, took some pictures, and headed back to the room waiting for the verdict.

Dr. Chudick came in, looking serious as always, and pulled up the xrays. There it was in black and white (literally) significant bone growth, almost 90% back to normal. He was stunned. So stunned, he counted the weeks back since surgery, then, looked at the xrays again, then looked at me and smiled. He extended his hand, expressing pretty genuine surprise that I recovered this much, this fast. And with that, he cleared me to race duathlons, cycling road races, and running road races. I can't swim yet, but, that's looking more likely by our next meeting.

What does all this mean? Well, in hard numbers, I took a severe, season-ending, and quite possibly career ending surgery, looked it right in the eye, and took it on, without a doubt I would come back stronger than ever. I took a 20-24 week projected recovery plan, which is agressive even for elite athletes, and got cleared to race, not just train, but race in 10 weeks. Most athletes don't even consider training hard until 24 weeks. But I not only was able to train, but grow bone simultaneously, and get stronger every day, not weaker.

The question he asked was "how". This is my chance to be truly honest as to how I got this far. I wrote down every time someone would tell me to "slow down", "consider hanging it up", "maybe time to give up on my dreams", "that I would never be an elite athlete again", thier names, and saved it all on slips of paper. When these types of comments were made, I would nod silently, and inside, I was saying "no way do I believe you". I followed my doctor's orders. I stayed consistent, and remain consistent with phyiscal therapy. I researched more homeopathic ways of healing, I iced my shoulder and still do, and I did research on the anatomy and more importantly, the genetics of my family. For the last part, I went to the best source I could think of, my grandmother, who at 98, had to know something about our genes.

I kept active, walking, then when I was allowed by my doc, rode indoors. Then got on the elliptical machine. And I always kept those small pieces of paper close by, a reminder of what people thought I couldn't do. Then when I was cleared to run, I started running. But the one thing I did that helped me the most, I never lost faith in myself and my ability to recover, and overcome. When I sat down with Nate Aye and John Conquest out of Crossfit DuPage, I trusted they knew what I needed to get stronger. When I would see my physical therapists at Accelerated Rehab, I trusted they were pushing me in the right direction. And through it all, I never allowed myself to get down. No matter the time it took, the difficulty in doing the simplest of tasks, I never lost faith. And still, I kept those sheets of paper.

On a couple occasions, a close friend would ask how those negative words were helpful. Well, here's your answer- they were fuel for me to get back and better than ever. It wasn't so much about proving people wrong, it was about reminding myself, I have been through tough times before and rebounded, so this was just another bump in the road, another hurdle to jump. And along this journey, I've met some incredible people who I know I will be friends with for a long time.

I'm not 100% recovered, and frankly, its will always by my doctor's call as to when I get to take the next step in training and racing, but my season isn't lost. I can race next month, and although my mulitsport options are limited, there are winter marathons on the horizon, and maybe some 12-24 hour cycling races. What I have learned through all this is, as long as you don't lose faith in yourself, as long as you don't become your biggest obstacle, than no matter what anyone says, you will achieve your goals. If you let negativity in, then it will prevent you from achieving things. If you allow others to sway your opinion, you'll never find your true self, your true goals and identity.

For those who have stood by me during all this, all my thank you's aren't enough. I have learned that I have been blessed with some true friends, and discovered the ones that weren't really friends at all. My biggest hope is that others will read this, and recognize they can do anything, you can do anything, as long as you keep believing. Hard work isn't enough, faith needs to be present to do it right.

Stay strong,

Guy